There is a great gift for Dads (and all the
family) on my website -- Great Conversation Starters…
These powerful conversations start with
questions that are positive and encourage a response beyond a ‘one word’
answer. Knowing how to ask a question is important so you can open the door to
dialogue and conversation.
AND, when you ask your child a good question
for a conversation starter—you should practice your good listening skills to
ensure your child learns to value sharing their thoughts and feelings with you.
Good listening is an important resiliency skill to model. You have to
practice…not just preach.
My free gift (http://www.finetunedfamilies.com/father-s-day-gift) gives you the conversations starters directions and examples around:
•Asking an open-ended question (to dream,
problem solve, or to forecast).
•Asking a specific conversation question (to
connect, to get information, or to plan).
Here are two simple guidelines on how to use
great conversations starters:
Guideline #1: You have two ears and one mouth.
This is the perfect ratio to help you remember to listen twice as much as you talk.
Ask the question, then be quiet. Sit so you
can lean in and share your interest in hearing the answer.
A. Make sure your phone is off/ put away
or in another room.
Obvious…and yet time and
time again I remind folks to practice electronic free conversations…the old
fashion way face-to-face.
B. Mind your ABC’s of good listening:
Attend with genuine attention
Be responsive to what is said
Care about the other person
Don’t interrupt
Encourage the person to say more ….
Guideline #2 Active Constructive Response
builds, strengthens, & maintains important relationships.
A. Ask follow up questions that show
enthusiasm and the desire to hear more
details.
B. Choose constructive responses over
destructive response.
This handy chart explains what active listening
is and is not:
|
Constructive
|
Destructive
|
|
|
Active
|
Show authentic interest
& support
|
Bring up negative
points, or correct their version of the sharing
|
|
Passive
|
Distracted or
understated support
|
‘One upping' distracts
from the sharing
|
Check out my free gift now at
Happy Father’s Day…may all your conversations with your kids be great
today!
Posts
