Thursday, October 27, 2016

DASH Coaching Can Get You "There"!

Yogi Berra once said, “If you don't know where you are going, you'll end up someplace else”.
Are you headed in the right direction? When you call for Uber, your driver should always know how to quickly get you to your destination.
How do you get from ‘here to there’?
A plan helps you know where you are going. A plan can be as simple or as complex as you need it to be. A plan motivates, inspires and gives you a sense of direction.
If you have a goal, then you need a plan to help you map out the best route for making the goal a reality. Sounds simple...and yet so many people struggle to move to action on this.
Statistics show people who write down their goals have over an 80% higher success rate of achieving them.Dollarphotoclub_60865498-800.jpg
Goals are to plans like compasses are to maps.
Goals are the destination, plans are the maps and compasses.
These are the tools to steer you in the right direction.
The Uber driver uses a map to plan the best way to get you to your destination. You too can use use a map to plan the best way to reach your goal. Your driver usually uses an app or a route plan. You can use a coach.

When you work with a coach you have
  • Structure: With a coach, a client takes more actions, thinks bigger and gets more done, due to the context of support and encouragement for addressing goals and taking action.
  • Expertise: A coach has skills and tools to assist the client in making better choices and decisions, setting clearer goals, and restructuring their professional and personal lives for maximum productivity and fulfillment.   
  • Synergy: The client and coach become a team, focusing on the client’s goals and needs, and accomplishing more than the client would alone.  Accountability is a big part of this synergy -- the unique relationship between client and coach lends itself to a system of progress checks, which promotes big results!

DASH Coaching with Parent and Relationship Coach Janet Bonnin, allows you to focus on one thing. This powerful coaching process allows you to get clear on what is holding you back, identify the steps needed to resolve issues, and find the support to take action. 

Like the Uber driver uses a map or an app to take you to one place, DASH Coaching will allow you to define one focus area and make a plan that will help you head in the right direction.

So, where are you headed in the next 30 days?
Are you headed in a direction that will allow you to accomplish your goals?
Do you have a plan?
Do you need to call a coach?

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Shifting Your Mindset Using the "Picture, Mirror, Window" Exercise

As a Parent Coach, I love sharing tools with you that help you “parent smarter”.  Today, my friend and associate, Angela Woodrow explores a concept that helps many in the process of looking at a current situation with a new eyes. When you can see things differently, you can have a different outcome.
Angela shares, “Start with a picture, a vision how you would like  things in your family to really be. Call it the ‘new reality’.  It can be anything you desire, dream, know you need. It can be how you hope your children to be as adults, or how you hope you and your children survive these next 90 days….You get the idea. Start somewhere. Create a picture.”
“The picture shifts to a mirror we see ourselves in. If it is a picture of how we would like to be in the next 90 days, look into that mirror and see…are those smiling face authentic or are theses faces showing smiles that are strained because you are ‘forcing fun’ or tolerating something that you think should be done but is NOT what everyone wants. Granted, not every minute of a year is fun and carefree, but every minute of everyday we have a choice of how our heart feels and our mind thinks. This is the value of looking at the picture and seeing into it as a mirror. We as a culture love to click a photo ‘in an instant’. When we do this ‘clicking in an instant’ we actually lose the ability to enjoy and participate in the moment. There are studies that show how much we miss when we are too busy ‘clicking in an instant’ (”
“When we are using the picture as a mirror, we are able to evaluate our actions, thoughts, feeling, and reframe or sharpen the actions thoughts and beliefs in the picture so that our picture and our current reality continually strive to be connected. This is THE most important part of our process as family: to KNOW and FEEL like we BELONG. And to BELONG is not ‘just’ FITTING IN’.  (a very important distinction for another conversation….). When we belong to a family we work together to continue to grow mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Reflection with the picture as a  mirror becomes a valuable tool to help us shift our thoughts and hearts over to our picture becoming what we see in our lives. This is when the mirror shifts to a window. With these new and or reframed/refreshed thoughts/ habits/ beliefs we can see out into our world with new perspective, energy, and approach. We use our new /reframed way of viewing and seeing things to create a larger understanding of where we are in the world as well as where we are in our spiritual and emotional journey called life.”
“There are different seasons to everything…and as a new season approaches out our window, the picture will change. The picture is our current reality and or new vision we have for our family. The picture then becomes a mirror and after reflection and adjustment, the mirror becomes a window  and the circle of life continues.”

These thoughts are reflections from various readings:
Mike and Sally Breen, Family on a Mission, 3DM Publishing, 2014
Brene Brown, Daring Greatly, Avery/ Penguin Publishing, 2012
Linda A. Henkel,Psychological Science, February 2014; vol. 25, 2: pp. 396-402., first published on December 5, 2013

Thursday, October 13, 2016

Mindful Parents Care For The Forest AND The Trees

by Guest Blogger Angela Woodrow
While watching a movie the other night I observed two very strong and determined men in charge of ‘saving the world’ discuss and reflect on what is important in life while they tried to catch their breath before the next onslaught of mayhem.
The two men were at different stages of their family life - one the father of a teenager and one with his first child on the way.
I will paraphrase the exchange:
The Father of the teenager:  “...Make sure they know you love them, that they know they belong to your family, that you are proud of them and help them find one thing they are passionate about in order to contribute and be productive in this world….”
Father to be:  (Incredulously): “That’s it? That is all you have to do?…What about electrical outlet covers, car seats,  safe, secure surroundings, good schools and enough money to  go to college….”
The Father of the teenager: (laughs) “Oh, yeah there’s that, but those things take care of themselves. The love, belonging and supporting them in finding their passion-- that is what you need to keep track of.”
It seems so easy…and yet it seems everyday is a challenge. For it is the forest (the love support, encouragement, helping them discover their passion, etc.) that helps a child grow into a confidant and functioning adult that will contribute to the community.  And for the forest to be healthy and vibrant, we do have to watch for, care for, and keep track of each individual tree (the car seats, the swim lessons, the extra tutoring, the tooth fairy for the 4th time… the special diet, etc.) in order for the whole forest to thrive.
Mindful Parenting is not a job for the faint of heart…it is a macro AND a micro process.
No one said it was going to be easy, but the journey is definitely worth it. And it is true what they say: Busy Families CAN Flourish - just like the trees in a well taken care of forest.